Friday Joke

[KeithB]

Teacher tells the class she will pose a question each Friday and whoever gets it right can have Monday off... So the class are studying hard all week and then its question time...
Teacher: Ok class here is todays question... How many balls of string would you need to tie together to reach the moon ?
... silence...
Teacher: anyone ? no one ? ok see you all on Monday...
The class goes home dejected.
The following Friday its the same thing...
Teacher : How long would it take a frog to hop 3 miles ?
...silence...
Teacher: anyone? no one? ok see you all on monday...
This goes on for a few weeks with the same type of mad questions... wee Johnny decides to catch her out so one week he gets two table tennis balls and paints them black...
Friday comes and the teacher asks the class to prepare for todays question... as she is about to speak, Johnny rolls the balls down the class floor...
Teacher: ok class... at this point she sees the table tennis balls rolling to the front of the class... furious she shouts... "Whos the comedian with the black balls"?
Wee Johnny jumps up, grabs his coat and shouts...

"Lenny Henry Miss... see yee on Tuesday...

 

[The Great Wallsendo]

another friday joke in the same vein...

another friday joke in the same vein...

Animal Game

One day the teacher decides to play an animal game. She holds up a picture of a giraffe and asks if anyone knows what it is.

No one raises their hand. The teacher says "See it's long neck? What animal has a long neck?"

Sally holds up her hand and asks if it is a giraffe. "Very good Sally," the teacher replies.

Next she holds up a picture of a zebra. None of the students holds up their hands. "See the stripes on this animal? What animal has stripes?"

Billy holds up his hand and says it is a zebra. "Very good Billy," the teacher replies.

Next she holds up a picture of a deer. None of the students holds up their hand. "See the big antlers on this animal. What animal has horns like this?"

Still no one guesses.

"Let me give you another hint, it's something your mother calls your father."

Johnny shouts out "I know what it is, it's a horny b*****d."