Paddy see's Mick trying to row his boat through a field of hay, he shouts across;
"Mick, it's thick t***s like you that give us a bad name......now if I could swim I come over there and give ya a clip"
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Paddy and Mick are looking at headstones in the cemetary,
Paddy says, "Mick will you look at this one, it says that this fella was 158"
Mick says, "bejeesus, what was his name?"
Paddy replies, "Miles......from London"
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Paddy is struggling down the street with a huge wardrobe,
Seamus spots him and says, "Paddy, that wardrobe looks heavy, you should get Mick to help you"
Paddy replies, "He is........he's inside carrying the clothes"
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Paddy and Mick are driving through the countryside.
Mick says, "Paddy, look over there, there's a flock of cows"
Paddy says, "Herd of cows ya thick t**t"
Mick replies, "Of course I've herd of cows......there's a flock of them over there"