Johnny\'s thinking

[bribones]

One day in class the teacher brought a bag full of fruit.

\"Now class, I\'m going to reach into the bag and describe a piece of fruit, and you tell what fruit I\'m talking about.\"

\"Okay, first: it\'s round, plump and red.\"

Of course, Johnny raised his hand high, but the teacher, wisely ignored him and picked Deborah, who promptly answered, \"An apple.\"

The teacher replied, \"No, Deborah, it\'s a beet, but I like your thinking.\"

\"Now for the second. It\'s soft, fuzzy,and colored red and brownish.\"

Johnny is hopping up and down in his seat trying to get the teacher to call on him. But she skips him again and calls on Billy.

\"Is it a peach?\" Billy asks. \"No, Billy, I\'m afraid it\'s a potato. But I like your thinking,\" the teacher replies.

\"Here\'s another: it\'s long, yellow, and fairly hard.\"

By now Johnny is about to explode as he waves his hand frantically. The teacher skips him again and calls on Sally.

\"A banana,\" she says.

\"No,\" the teacher replies, \"it\'s a squash, but I like your thinking.\"

Johnny is kind of irritated now, so he speaks up loudly. \"Hey, I\'ve got one for you teacher; let me put my hand in my pocket. Okay, I\'ve got it: it\'s round, hard, and it has a head on it.\"

\"Johnny!\" she cries. \"That\'s disgusting!\"

\"Nope,\" answers Johnny, \"its a pound coin, but I like your thinking!\"

 

[bribones]

Daddy Jonny


Little Johnny came running into the house and asked, \"Mommy, can little girls have babies?\"

\"No,\" said his mom, \"of course not.\"

Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, \"It\'s okay, we can play that game again!\"

 

[bribones]

Hiking


A father came home from a long business trip to find his son riding a new 21 speed mountain bike. \"Where did you get the money for the bike? It must have cost £200\" he asked.

\"Easy, dad,\" little Johnny replied. \"I earned it hiking.\"

\"Come on Johnny,\" the father said. \"Tell me the truth.\"

\"That is the truth!\" Johnny replied. \"Every night you were gone, mom\'s boss, Mr. Reynolds, would come over to see mom. He\'d give me a £20 note and tell me to take a hike!\"

 

[jonny_mc]

jonny

 

[bribones]

I can go fishing!


Little Johnny walks into a pharmacy and brings a box of tampons to the register.
The cashier looks at the boy and asks, \"Hi. Are these for your mom?\"

Little Johnny thinks for a moment and says, \"Umm, no.\"

The cashier says, \"Oh. Then they\'re for your sister?\"

Little Johnny says, \"Uh-unh.\"

The cashier, now a bit curious, says, \"Oh. Then they must be for your granny!\"

Little Johnny says, \"Nope.\"

The cashier is now really confused. Finally she asks, \"Well, what are you going to do with them?\"

Little Johnny says, \"Well, I\'m not sure yet. But on TV, they said if I buy these I can go fishing and swimming and horseback riding!\"