Dunno what\'s worse....Thinking of the pain I\'ll be going thru this time tomorrow or the ribbing I\'ve had all day at work......Cutting remarks (lol), videos, cartoons, e-mails you name it. Just as well I\'ve got broad shoulders (not just for the doctor to push on as he\'s riving at me nads)
Tony did you have it done in Alnwick????
Here\'s just some of the jokes....Was going to post the images of the actual op I received from the accounts manager but thought better of it.
Two guys, honouring a pact, go into a vasectomy clinic together. The nurse tells them to
fill out several forms, then takes them into a back room, where she tells them to strip.
While they are undressing she studies the first guy\'s forms, then his friend\'s. When they
are both naked, she tells the first guy to get up on the table, lie back, and relax. She
carefully examines his cock and balls, complimenting him on the thoroughness of the shave
he did at home.
Then, to the astonishment of both guys, she pours some oil into her hands and begins
jerking him off. Although the oil is pretty cold, the guy quickly rises to the occasion.
Still, he is surprised (he hadn\'t read about this at alt.support.vasectomy!), and, between
moans, asks the nurse, why the handjob? The nurse, without missing a stroke, explains that
the treatment is a standard part of the pre-vasectomy preparation, as the tubes are easier
to cut if they have been recently cleared.
After a few more seconds of pretty brisk pumping, the guy splatters all over his belly,
and the nurse declares him ready for the knife, wiping her hands on a tissue, and tossing
the tissue into the trash. Then she tells the second guy to take his friend\'s place. The
second guy, who is already hard from watching what the nurse did to his friend, quickly
lifts himself onto the table.
He lies back and closes his eyes. But things are even better than he expected. Instead of
a handjob, he gets a long, slow blowjob, the best of his life! When it is finally over,
and he is lying exhausted and sweaty on the table, his friend can\'t help complaining: \"How
come all I got was cold oil and a handjob, and he gets the best blowjob of his life?\"
\"That,\" explains the nurse, as she dabs daintily at the corners of her mouth, \"is the
difference between BUPA and the National Health Service!\"
One day, after a man had his annual physical, the doctor came out and said, \"You had a
great checkup. Is there anything that you\'d like to talk about or ask me?\"
\"Well,\" he said, \"I was thinking about getting a vasectomy.\"
\"That\'s a pretty big decision. Have you talked it over with your family?\"
\"Yeah, and they\'re in favor 15 to 2.\"
While doing a vasectomy, the doctor slipped and cut off one of the man\'s balls. To avoid a huge malpractice suit, he decided to replace the missing ball with an onion.
Several weeks later, the patient returned for a checkup. \"How\'s your sex life?\" the doctor asked. \"Pretty good, but I\'ve had some strange side effects.\" \"Like what?\" the doctor asked anxiously. \"Well, every time I piss my eyes water. When my wife gives me a blow job she gets heartburn. And every time I pass a hotdog stand, I get a hard-on.\"